iPod Serial Killer

I am an iPod serial killer.

iPod serial

killer

1. A person who commits multiple (more than two) iPod murders, especially similar ones with no obvious motive over a period of time

The most important thing I look for in an iPod (or iPods) is a name. It doesn't matter the shape. The size. The amount of music played. The songs on it. All that matters is it has a name.

The first brick of an iPod I had was named Pancho. It was about 3 inches thick and weighed about the same. It lost it's life to one too many skiing trip accidents and a dead battery. It was tough to watch him go, but he lived a long life. The longest of all my iPods. Almost 3 years and I understood that his time was up.

Next was Lefty. Lefty and I never saw eye to eye. In part because he was my mom's old iPod and couldn't understand my style of listening to music and in part because he knew he was Pancho's sloppy second.Lefty resides in Fort Worth with my uncle now. Good riddance, is all I have to say.

Jr. was a present for getting good grades. I worked my butt off studying and he was the sweet surprise at the end of the year. I named him after my year in school. He will always be my favorite iPod, sleek, black and played videos (finally!!). I loved him because of the reward he represented. The constant reminder that I worked hard and deserved nice things. Jr will always have a spot in my heart. I don't even remember how he died. Maybe of overuse and a dead battery. But I blocked the memory out of my mind.

Next came DUKE. I had the hardest time thinking of his name. Duke was bought with my own money online, off of E-Bay. He looked and felt just like Jr. I still get the two of them mixed up in my mind. He lasted a few years but his battery kept going off and on. He was a re-bound iPod. My mind and heart missed Jr. too much to really care about Duke. My dad tried to change out his battery and he reached an untimely death. I wasn't there to see it happen. Or to see him thrown in the trash.

White House came while I still had Duke. White House is like my dysfunctional family member. We have a love and hate relationship. Sometimes it annoys me to no end and I just give up on music for the day. But I always come back to it. White House lives in my car, always plugged in to a charger because it would die otherwise. White House goes to the gym with me and has driven me across Round Rock, Austin and all over Texas. White House keeps me upbeat and energetic, even if his battery dies when I need him most. I can't stay mad for long.

My newest iPod is that perfect, goody two shoes that I get sick of. DARTH VADER.

He's so... dependable. Always there playing what I want to hear. When my alarm goes off at 5:37 AM, there he is, playing John Mayer. When he goes off again at 5:45 he's back playing more soothing wake up music. Just like I asked him to.

I'm over it.

Maybe I'm scared to form any attachment to him because I know he'll end up like the rest- in the trash can. Or at the very least, like White House, dysfunctional and breaking down all the time.

Maybe I'll start to like him, one day. But until then I'll keep thinking of names for iPod Number 7.